Zutara Week 2014
by LadyArinn
Summary: My writings for Zutara Week 2014
1. Melancholy

Hello! Welcome! Have a seat! Grab a snack! I'm so glad you joined me here today!

Whelp, this is my fist time participating in this week, because it's the first time I've managed to force myself to sit down and actually write the little prompts. I hope you enjoy! The wordy prompt is in the title, as well as below, along with a nifty little definition. Yeay!

(Also, as you can tell, I got _real _inventive with the titles and the summary for this thing)

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**_Melancholy_**_- a sad mood or feeling_

Katara could hear Aang laughing through the open windows as she walked through one of the numerous and cavernous halls of the Fire Nation's palace, and she supposed he was entertaining the guests out in one of the gardens. She should be out there too, she should be talking and laughing and having a good time, enjoying the nation's best foods and drinks and music as everyone waited for the ceremony to start. But she couldn't. She'd been out there, had stood at Aang's side for all but a minute before suddenly she was starting to suffocate even as she breathed. She'd been drowning in the happily mindless conversations and the light sounds of music, and she just couldn't stand another second of it.

She'd excused herself with some lie about needing to freshen up, and now she was just wandering the halls, not knowing what she was doing or where she was wandering too. She knew she'd have to go back soon because someone would come looking for her eventually, knew that if she didn't get over this mood of hers it would make people worry and question. She couldn't do that. She couldn't ruin even a little piece of this day for anyone.

But she was going to allow herself just a minute, just one solitary minute. She deserved and needed that much.

She entered a room at random, just a large sitting room that housed a set of long sofas with windows overlooking the sunlit garden and all of the colorful guests that filled it below. Quietly, she shut the door behind her before walking over to the window and looking down at the gathering, making sure to stay hidden from sight in case anyone happened to look up.

Everyone was so happy and they were laughing and talking and smiling and doing everything she couldn't seem to force herself to do at the moment. When she thought about the reason as to why she was so upset, she felt ashamed of herself.

She should be happy. She _was _happy. She and Aang were creating a foundation that they would build a wonderful life and family on together someday, and it was good. It was all good.

_Is it what you want though?_ A treacherous part of her mind whispered to her, its tone both taunting and knowing. _What you really truly want?_

"Yes." She hissed to herself, crossing her arms and gripping her upper arms tightly as if the pain would make that word dig in and become a truth as she caught sight of Aang down below. Wonderful, kind, sweet Aang. "Yes."

Yes because she loved Aang. She really, really did. She loved him and was usually very happy with him, and everything was good. They were good together, and she knew that they always would be.

But…

But she wasn't happy all of the time, such as this moment, now. It was worse now because of everything that was going on, but it certainly wasn't the first time she'd had to escape because she just couldn't take the suffocation of it all anymore. And while she loved Aang, she knew they were missing something that the boy (he was a man now, but a part of her would always see him as she first had when she accidentally freed him from that iceberg) didn't seem to realize wasn't there. Probably because he hadn't felt it before.

It wasn't vital, this thing. It was something they could do without and still lead happy lives regardless of its not being there. And they _would._ They really, really would. But she wanted so badly to have it, to feel everything she couldn't find herself feeling with Aang, everything she had only found towards one person before. At first, at the start, she had thought that she could have it with Aang. That it was just a thing that could happen with anyone, that even if she didn't feel anything even close to it at that moment, it would come. One day, it would come.

It hadn't.

That part of her, that all knowing and evil part of her, screamed at her to go. _Just go_. It would be fine. Hadn't she seen it, the way he looked at her? Hadn't she seen the light in his eyes that spoke to her and told her that he felt what she did too, and wanted it just as badly?

Didn't she love him just as much as she loved Aang, if not more? Wasn't this love better? Brighter? So hot and bright and sweet and the kind of love that would actually allow her to breathe?

Tears were gathering in her eyes, and she didn't realize it until the door slowly opened behind her and he walked in as if her thoughts had called him to her, closing the door behind him as he stepped in. She jerked in shock and that was when the tears she wasn't even aware of having began to fall, sliding down her cheeks to drip down onto the plush carpet beneath her sandaled feet.

"Katara? Are you okay?"

"Yeah." She sniffed, hurrying to wipe the tears away before she turned, smiling unconvincingly at the man who was half of the reason for her mood. "I'm fine."

"Are you sure?" Zuko stepped a bit closer, and though the entire room separated them it was too close for Katara. Far too close on a day like today with a mood like hers.

_Go ahead,_ that voice whispered, a plea in its tone that she tried her hardest to ignore. _Tell him. Go to him. Please, just this once, give in. It'll be good. It'll be _better_. You'll see._

And even though she started to open her mouth, started to form those sweet and world shattering words, she stopped herself. She stopped herself because Aang was down in the garden laughing, and no matter what, no matter how she felt, she couldn't do anything so awful to him. Sweet Aang. Kind Aang. Avatar Aang. Aang, the boy who had lost everything so young and who was so looking forward to finally having a family again. Aang who loved her so much and would never do anything to hurt her.

She would never hurt Aang. Not when he didn't deserve it. Not for anything.

"Of course I'm sure." Katara smiled at the concerned man, and she was so pleased at how clear her voice was now, how easily the fake smile spread on her face. "What I'm not so sure of is what you're doing here."

"I-" He started, and for just a moment, just one burning moment she could see that he was going to say it. He was going to break their worlds apart with the words they were both hiding away, and she didn't know whether to be happy or crushed that that moment passed, the words along with it. "I just needed to take a minute to myself, I guess."

She nodded and started toward the door. "I'll leave you to it, I suppose." But even as she was saying that, she was drifting away from the path to the door and was instead going towards him, stopping right in front of him.

They stood in an uneasy silence for a moment before she reached out and smoothed a non-existent wrinkle from the front of his robes, letting her hand rest there for just a moment. Testing herself and her resolve, and also indulging for just one moment. Nearly everything inside of her was begging to take another step forward, to just get a little closer and let all of those secret words fall between them and finally see the light of day. And she wanted to. She really, really wanted to.

But just because she wanted it didn't mean that it was right or that it was going to happen.

"Katara-" Zuko started, one of his own hands coming up to her own, circling her wrist and getting so close, too close, to going past that edge neither of them could ever go back to once they went over.

She quickly pulled her hand away before he could go any farther.

"Well, I have to get back to everyone before they start searching because I'm certainly not the focus of the day. And you, Zuko," She smiled at him, though she could see in his eyes that it was a weak and unconvincing thing, "You have a bride to be getting to." She started to slip past him, heading towards the door and freedom from temptation.

"Katara, wait!" She stopped at the threshold, turning her head back just the slightest so that she could see him in the corner of her eye. But even though she kept herself from fully turning around, she could still clearly see everything that was written all over Zuko's face. He wanted her to stop because he wanted to make sure that she wanted to leave what was between them, letting it wither and die as they made lives with other people. Because there was still time. They could still do it, they could still say those words that would change everything. But after today, after the ceremony, after this moment, then it was all done forever, laid to rest and never brought back because then to succumb would be to destroy everything and everyone around them.

They only had this one last chance. Only this.

But still, Katara couldn't take it. Instead she turned her head away to face forward. "Congratulations on everything, Zuko. I hope you and your wife find happiness." She hurried away as soon as the words passed her stiff lips, but it wasn't quite fast enough to miss the _"You too."_ That was said to her back as the door closed stiffly between them.

This time, forever.

It hurt. It was an agony she didn't realize would be so awful until now because she hadn't realized that there had always been that small bit of hope inside of her that they could still do it. That they could actually act on what had built up between them and be happy together. But with this that small part of her was dead, strangled by her own desperate hands.

And it hurt. But no matter what she would have done or chosen, it would have hurt. If she had chosen otherwise, it probably would have been worse, been an agony she couldn't pick herself up from because she would have hurt someone she loved so deeply. This… They could walk away from this. Zuko would be happy with his wife and she would be happy with Aang, and their futures would be good. She knew they would be. So she had made the right choice. She knew she had made the right one.

She hoped she had.

Taking a few shuddering breaths, she water bent some of the water that was in her ever present pouch at her side and splashed her face, clearing all signs that everything could be anything but perfect. Bending the water back and making sure that everything was set to rights, she allowed herself a moment more before starting forward, determined to shake off her melancholy mood.

She had a wedding to attend, after all, and weddings were happy occasions.


	2. Jubilant

**_Jubilant_**_- feeling or expressing great joy_

When he came into the bedroom from his bath, the first thing he noticed was that Katara was already in bed, curled up on her side and facing the spot where he always slept. The second was that she wasn't alone.

"Will she be alright in bed like this with us in it?" Zuka asked, hesitant to get in, staring at the newborn as if he would somehow hurt it just by being near.

"Yeah." Katara sighed, shifting a bit but never allowing her eyes to leave the little bundled up baby who laid beside her. "I'll put her in her crib by herself in a minute. I just wanted to watch her and lay with her a bit."

Zuko nodded and carefully slipped into the bed, careful not to jostle his wife or his daughter – his _daughter_ – too much. The laid there for such a long time just watching the baby, each dozing slightly every now and then before catching themselves before they went too far asleep.

The baby made a gurgling-choking noise, which prompted Zuko to reach out with a finger and brush it gently over her miniscule hand until the baby caught it and gripped surprisingly tight.

"Hey, Kya. Hi." He murmured, staring down at the contrast between his pale skin and the baby's darker color. Between that and the fluff of dark curls on top of her head, the Fire Lord was almost certain that she was going to be a miniature of her mother.

"She's going to have your eyes though. I can tell." Katara yawned, curling up a bit tighter. Zuko looked up at her, surprised that he had said his last thought out loud, and also surprised at the fact that his daughter would have his eyes. He didn't know why it surprised him, or why it took until that for it to hit him that all of this was real.

"Wow." He whispered, looking down to where his finger was still caught in a tiny grip, "Wow."

He looked back up at Katara to see that she was smiling softly at him.

"Hi." He whispered to her, a small smile making its way onto his face and threatening to never leave, "I'm a dad."

"Hi." She whispered back, a larger smile on her face, eyes dancing as well, "I'm a mom."

And suddenly the both of them, so happy that they couldn't hold it in anymore, started to laugh a happy and carefree laugh that was almost giggle. Laying there, so happy they could burst, they laughed together and marveled at what they had created.

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Not really all that happy with this one.


End file.
